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Dan the Man's Movie Reviews

All my aimless thoughts, ideas, and ramblings, all packed into one site!

Gamer (2009)


God, I wish I was playing a video game instead of watching this crap.

It’s 2034, and humans can control and kill each other in a large-scale online gaming world. But Kable (Gerard Butler), a wrongfully convicted soldier forced to join the violent competition, tries to free himself by taking out its evil architect, Ken (Michael C. Hall). While being controlled by a rich kid (Logan Lerman), Kable must also save his wife, Angie (Amber Valletta), who’s trapped in her own avatar world.

Looking at the plot and trailer from a far, I was thinking it looks really cheesy, but at the same-time, bat-shit crazy which is always good. However, it’s not good here.

The problem with this film is that it really is all over the place, with no sense of logic or control whatsoever. I get the satire and what the film is trying to say, by saying we’re to feel guilty for what the world has become in exploiting violence and death on TV, movies, and even in video games, but the problem is that the film focuses on this by showing us loads and loads of amounts of violence and death. The script also tried too hard to be witty or funny at points, and it just ended up being weird or dumb really.

Sometimes when you have crazy, slam-banging action thrillers, you don’t have to really rely on the story because the action is always there to keep you busy. However, this film doesn’t even do that so well, and that’s all blame on writing and directing team Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor, known for the even crazier Crank films. The problem here is that all the violence just looks terrible, and the way they film this just makes it look low-budget, and a cheap indie film. The action is OK I guess, but that shaky cam gets way too annoying for points, and you don’t even feel like you’re watching a movie anymore, you almost feel like your on a LSD trip. Make sure you just take yourself some mushrooms before you go in.

Also, what the hell was up with all those titty shots? It was like almost every time this film cooled down, they just decided to show some big boobies. Usually, I don’t mind this, but this film literally over-does the whole “boob shot” thing for me, which I thought I’d never have to say….ever.

Gerard Butler is alright in this role as Kable. I have always had faith in this guy, and I do believe he will eventually get that role that will bring him back up, but as the main hero in this film, he is OK. Michael C. Hall does his very best to do a Southern accent as the villain, Ken Castle, and this really doesn’t work probably because they make him seem so cheesy, but this film probably made that on purpose. I still don’t know what Kyra Sedgwick was doing here, and why the hell she accepted this piece of crap! There are also others in this film that need new agents such as Logan Lerman, Amber Valletta, John Leguizamo, Ludacris, and a totally jacked-up Terry Crews. Also, Keith David shows up too! What the hell is wrong with these people!?!? It’s not the cast’s fault as to why these characters suck, it’s the damn film itself.

Consensus: By taking a glorious amount of psychedelics beforehand one could actually have an enjoyable time with this crazy, all-over-the-place action thriller, but if sober, you may find yourself totally bored, annoyed, and just not entertained one bit by this dumb piece of failed satire.

1/10=SomeOleBullShitt!!

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11 responses to “Gamer (2009)

  1. Modest Movie March 17, 2011 at 12:32 am

    It’s the Gerard Butler curse. Any film with him in it (except 300) is a good one to stay away from. It’s too bad because I hoped that this and Law Abiding Citizen would turn things around for him. He really needs to find the witch doctor that gave him the bad juju.

  2. Nostra March 17, 2011 at 7:07 am

    It was very disappointing indeed, hardly remember anything about it anymore.

  3. Wynter Tyson March 17, 2011 at 7:51 am

    Since writing my review I’ve gone back to the film a couple of times and I’ve got to say that Gamer is a great film. It actually has the balls to go completely overboard and not really give a damn about it.

    It is trash but it is glorious trash with a real brain.

  4. Eric March 17, 2011 at 2:35 pm

    I was initially intrigued by this simply because Michael C. Hall is the man, but I can’t bring myself to watch it. It just sounds like a terrible movie. Nice review, man!

  5. JL March 18, 2011 at 9:55 am

    I actually didn’t think this was THAT horrible. Yes, it was definitely a throw-away movie and easily forgettable and it wasn’t near as good as I hoped, but it was unbearable either. It’s not like I regretted watching it. I was mildly entertained through watching it. But indeed it’s not even close to being anything special (or even up to par of mediocrity).

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